Are you wounded?

    Have you ever tried to put some water on a fresh wound? If you have, you must have felt some pain. Water, which can never harm you if you were not injured, has just made you feel some pain when it touched your wound, simply because when we develop a wound we tend to become over sensitive to factors that didn't bother us before.

    The same goes for emotional wounds: What if you have some emotional wounds that are making you over-sensitive to factors that other people don't even notice? All of these small things that are bothering you may be harmless on their own, but they hurt you because they touch your wounds just like the water did.

    Emotional Wounds and Emotional Pain

    Why do you think you felt that bad when they didn't call you? Is it because they are bad people? And why wasn't your friend, whom they also didn't call, bothered the way you are? It's because he is not wounded. Your wound in this case may be social approval; you may have been wounded before by people who didn't approve of you and so whenever someone ignores you again it hurts, not because it should hurt, but because it touched your wound and reminded you of the past rejection.

    How many times do you find a girl asking her friends for reassurance of her good looks just after breaking up? Why did she feel pain? Did she love him that much? No, it's just that she was wounded before. When she was young, people always used to make fun of her because she was too slim; now whenever someone rejects her, she feels bad, not because of the rejection, but because this rejection touched her old wound.

    Why do you think a guy may feel broken and devastated when he gets a rejection letter? Is it because he really wanted the job that much? Not really. If he wanted it that much, he would have felt bad about the rejection but not broken; it's just that this rejection touched an old wound. As a child he was seldom encouraged by his parents and so he grew up lacking self-confidence in his abilities. Whenever he gets a rejection letter, he feels much pain, not because of being worried about his future, but because of his old wound that hasn't yet healed.

    Those Wounds Are Making You Vulnerable

    Those wounds are making you vulnerable! Things that others usually don't pay attention to may prevent you from sleeping just because you have some wounds that haven't healed. The more wounds you have, the more you'll find that small things bother you and eventually become over-sensitive to every critical comment even if the other person didn't really mean to offend you.

    The more wounds you have the less time you will feel happy, because every now and then, something will touch your wound and make you feel bad, just like the water touches your wounded hand in the example above. Some people think that they can heal their wounds by forgetting about them or by keeping themselves busy, however, this strategy always works against them.

    Happiness can't be really achieved unless you get rid of your emotional wounds or at least start dealing with them. Heal your wounds, face your problems, stop turning your back to them and you will kill depression.

    How to Heal These Wounds?

    Before you can heal any of these wounds you should first identify their location, or in other words, know the reason behind that wound. Don't just be passive; seek your answers and trace your wounds to their origin. If critical comments bother you, then don't just stay like that. Search the web, read more, think and analyze until you know the root cause and when you finally know the cause, healing the wound itself becomes much simpler.

    Reading in a website like this may let you discover the cause of many of your wounds and so help you to recover. Remember, if you try to just escape or forget about these wounds, they aren't going to leave you alone, they will remind you of their existence with each rejection, critical comment or whenever you get dumped or ignored. Don't leave your wounds like that, heal them and eliminate some of your weak points.

    Have you healed emotional wounds that were causing you pain? Please share your experiences in the comments below.

    你受傷了嗎？

    你試過把水灑在新的傷口上嗎？如果你試過，定會感到些許疼痛。如果沒有受傷，水是不會傷害你的，倘若受了傷，水流過傷口時，便會有幾許疼痛。原因很簡單，我們受傷時，往往會對以前不曾困擾我們的因素變得過分敏感。

    感情的創傷也是如此：如果你在感情上受了傷，而這些創傷讓你對別人毫不在意的事情變得過分敏感，你該怎么辦呢？所有這些困擾著你的瑣事它們本身并無害處，卻能讓你受到傷害，這是因為它們像水一樣正觸碰著你感情的傷口。

    感情創傷和感情苦痛

    為什么他們沒有給你打電話，你會感到傷心難過呢？因為他們心地不善嗎？你的朋友也沒有接到他們的電話，為什么這種情況卻不會困擾你呢？那是因為他（你的朋友）的這種情況并沒有傷害你。在這件事中，你傷心難過的原因或許在于社會的認同；在此之前也許你曾被那些不認同你的人傷害過，所以此后每當有人再次忽視你時，你便會受傷。不是因為這件事情本身傷害了你，而是因為這種情形觸及你的情感創傷，讓你回想起了過去曾被否定的情景。

    曾經幾次一個女孩在結束一段感情后會向她的女友確認她是否美麗動人？為什么她會感到痛苦？她真的很愛他嗎？并非如此，只是因為在此之前她在感情上曾受過傷。年輕時人們總是嘲笑她長得太瘦小，如今每當遭到別人的拒絕，她總會情緒低落，不是因為別人拒絕了她而難過，而是因為這種情形觸及了她的舊傷。

    為什么你認為一個男孩收到回絕函時他會感到崩潰和沮喪？因為他真的很想得到這份工作嗎？其實不然。如果他真的很想得到這份工作，只會難過而不會崩潰；正是因為這種被否定的情形觸及了他的舊傷。他在小的時候就很少受到父母的贊許，所以長大后對自己的能力缺乏自信。每當收到回絕函時，他便憂傷滿懷，并不是因為擔心自己的將來，而是因為他的舊傷還未愈合。

    那些創傷讓你如此脆弱

    那些創傷讓你如此脆弱！那些通常被別人忽略的事情讓你無法入睡，因為你的傷口還未愈合。你受到的傷害越多，越感到哪怕是很小的事情也在煩擾著你，最終你會變得對所有的批評過分敏感，即便批評你的那個人并非真正有意打擊你。

    受傷越多，感受到快樂的時光就越少，因為那些事情會不時地觸碰你的傷口，讓你感到疼痛，就好像上例子中水淌過你受傷的手一樣。有些人以為忘記傷痛或者讓自己忙碌便可以治愈感情創傷，然而，結果總會事與愿違。

    只有你治愈了感情的創傷或者至少已經開始療傷，幸福才會真正來臨。治愈創傷，正視問題，直面傷痛，你將不再消沉沮喪。

    如何治愈感情創傷？

    在治療這些傷口之前，首先必須弄清它們的位置，換句話說，你要先弄明白這些傷痛的原因。對待這些創傷不能僅僅采取被動的態度，而要尋找你的答案并追蹤傷痛的根源。如果那些針對你的批評意見煩擾著你，那么就不要像那樣呆站在原地了。可以通過上網、閱讀、思考和分析的方法，直到你找到最根本的原因，弄清楚原因以后，治愈你的傷口會變得更加簡單。

    l 瀏覽像這樣的網站可以讓你找到很多受傷的原因，這樣就有助于你療傷。記住，如果你一味想著逃避或者遺忘這些傷痛，那么它們將不會遠離你，相反，每當你遭到否定、受到批評，或是被甩、被忽視時，它們將提醒你它們依然存在。不要再讓這些創傷如此折磨你了，治愈它們，消除你情感上的薄弱點。

    你曾治愈過那些讓你痛楚的感情創傷么？請在下面的評論欄中與大家分享你的經驗。