Be positive

    "Positivity makes you more attractive and resilient, with lower blood pressure, less pain, fewer colds, better sleep. Increase the number of positive emotions in your day, however fleeting. One can lead to another and so on, until we're in an upward spiral of positivity. Take a moment to find the good in a situation. Don't over-generalise （'I can never hold down a relationship'）, jump to conclusions （'I'll never finish this job'） or ruminate endlessly. Any healthy distraction – a run, a swim – that lifts your mood is good."

    Barbara Fredrickson is Kenan distinguished professor of psychology, University of North Carolina.

    Be brave

    "Studies show people regret not having done things much more than they regret things they did. Why? We can rationalise an excess of courage more easily than an excess of cowardice, because we can console ourselves by thinking of the things we learned from the experience. We hedge our bets when we should blunder forward. In fact, large-scale assaults on our happiness – a lost job or failed marriage – trigger our psychological defences （and hence promote our happiness） more than smaller annoyances. The paradoxical consequence is that it is sometimes easier to achieve a positive view of a very bad experience than a bad one. And yet we rarely choose action over inaction. Knowing we overestimate the impact of almost every life event makes me a bit braver and more relaxed because I know what I'm worrying about probably won't matter as much as I think it will."

    Daniel Gilbert is professor of psychology, Harvard University.

    Meditate

    "Meditation helps us better manage our reactions to stress and recover more quickly from disturbing events. This is key to happiness. One study took people in high-stress jobs and taught them meditation for eight weeks: they felt happier after and even remembered why they liked their work. Before, they were too stressed to see it. Beginners can benefit from meditation, but it takes practice to see real benefits. I recently spent an evening with Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, the an lama dubbed 'the happiest man in the world'. How did he get that way? Practice. Observing his behaviour, I noticed he recovered quickly from upsets and this is one way science measures a happy temperament. If you start to get upset, let go of the negative thought, deal with the problem – and then let go of that."

    Daniel Goleman is a psychologist and author, based in Massachusetts.

    Be kind to yourself

    "The way we relate to ourselves – kindly or critically – has a major influence on our wellbeing, contentment and ability to cope with setbacks. If you're feeling self-critical, stop, take a few breaths, slow down and try to think of the ideal qualities you might have, such as kindness, warmth, gentleness. It doesn't matter whether or not you actually have these qualities – like an actor taking on a part, feel yourself become them. In a journal, make a note of what happens to your self-criticism when you do this. Then turn your attention to what you're about to do."

    Paul Gilbert is professor of clinical psychology, University of Derby.

    Use your pessimism

    "Defensive pessimists expect the worst and expend lots of energy mentally rehearsing how things might go wrong. But by doing this, they can improve the odds of achieving their goals. It's a useful skill for everyone to learn. Imagine what might go wrong in a situation by focusing on specifics. If you're terrified of public speaking, try to articulate whether you're afraid of fumbling with your notes or tripping on your way to the podium. Then imagine what happens next: if you drop your notes, will someone laugh? By doing this you shift the attention from feelings to facts, so you can plan effectively to avoid （or at least deal with） negative outcomes if they occur."

    Julie Norem is Margaret Hamm professor of psychology, Wellesley College, Massachusetts.

    Find a calling

    "Work less, earn less, accumulate less and 'consume' more family time, holidays and other enjoyable activities. Pursue goals but remember, it's the journey, not the end result, that counts. If your work is not a calling, can you reframe it to see it as more than just a pay cheque? If not, try to find a noble purpose outside work – religion, teaching, political campaigning. Find activities that fully engage your attention and you're good at: singing in a choir, painting, driving fast on a curvy country road. This is known as 'flow'. Happiness is not a shallow state of feeling chipper all the time, or something you can achieve directly. We need love, work and a connection to something larger. Get these conditions right, then wait."

    Jonathan Haidt is professor of psychology, University of Virginia.

    Act happy

    "My research compares happy and unhappy people, and underpinning this is the 40% solution: the degree of happiness it is within our power to change, through how we act and think. I've identified 12 happiness-enhancing activities – things happy people do naturally. They may sound corny, but they're scientifically proven. You don't have to do them all – decide which fit you best. One, express gratitude. Two, cultivate optimism: visualise a future in which everything has turned out the way you want it, then write it down. Three, avoid obsessing over things or paying too much attention to what others are doing. Four, practise acts of kindness – more than you're used to. Five, make time for friends; be supportive and loyal. Six, develop coping strategies: write down your feelings when you're feeling upset and try to see that traumatic events often make us stronger. Seven, learn to forgive. Eight, immerse yourself in activities and be open to new ones. Nine, savour life's joys – linger over a pastry rather than mindlessly consuming it. Ten, work towards meaningful goals. Eleven, practise religion and spirituality. And finally, exercise. You won't see the results from these activities right away: like anything important, you have to work at it."

    Sonja Lyubomirsky is professor of psychology, University of California.

    Be positive 積極

    "積極能夠讓人更加富有活力，更具吸引力，并且還能夠幫助人降低血壓、減輕疼痛、減少感冒紀(jì)律、獲得更好的睡眠。所以一天之中要多幾次積極的情緒，即使時(shí)間很短也沒關(guān)系。一次積極的情緒會(huì)引發(fā)出下一次，然后是下下次、下下下次……直到我們的積極性得到很大的提高。遇到什么事情的時(shí)候，花點(diǎn)時(shí)間想想它好的一面。不要過分概括（比如想"我永遠(yuǎn)都控制不好這種關(guān)系"）,不要妄下定論（比如想"這工作永遠(yuǎn)都做不完"）,也不要總是不停地思考某件事。任何健康的、能夠分散你注意力的事情都會(huì)使你的情緒好起來，比如跑步、游泳。""

    Barbara Fredrickson is Kenan distinguished professor of psychology, University of North Carolina . 芭芭拉弗雷德里克松是北卡羅萊納大學(xué)凱南杰出的心理學(xué)教授，.

    Be brave勇敢

    "研究顯示，如果有件事人們想做而沒去做，那么他們的悔意會(huì)比因他們做過的事情而產(chǎn)生的悔意強(qiáng)烈的多。為什么呢？我們能夠更容易為冒失找到合理的理由而不是過分懦弱，因?yàn)槲覀兛梢园参孔约赫f我們從這一次經(jīng)歷中吸取了教訓(xùn)。在前進(jìn)過程中犯錯(cuò)的時(shí)候我們可以保護(hù)自己。實(shí)際上，對(duì)我們的快樂產(chǎn)生重大影響的事情，比如失去工作或者婚姻失敗，要比那些普普通通的小煩惱更能引發(fā)我們的心理防御能力（從而提高我們的快樂感）.這一矛盾的后果就是，有時(shí)候面對(duì)一件非常糟糕的事情中我們的態(tài)度反而要比面對(duì)一般糟糕的事情更積極。還有，我們很少選擇面對(duì)事情無所作為。了解到我們高估了生活中某些事情對(duì)我們的影響后，我們會(huì)變得勇敢一些，也會(huì)更加輕松，因?yàn)槲覀冎�道我們�?dān)心的問題可能并不會(huì)像我們想的那樣糟糕。

    丹尼爾吉爾伯特是哈佛大學(xué)的心理學(xué)教授。

    Meditate冥想

    "沉思能夠幫助我們更好地控制自己在壓力下的反應(yīng)，并能夠使我們從不安中盡快得恢復(fù)過來。這是快樂的關(guān)鍵。有一項(xiàng)研究是讓人們從事高壓力工作，并在8個(gè)星期里教他們冥想之法，研究結(jié)果是他們感到快樂，甚至記得為什么會(huì)喜歡這一工作。在此之前，甚至僅僅想到這種工作，他們都會(huì)倍感壓力。初學(xué)者可以受益于冥想，但需要多加練習(xí)才能真正從中受益。最近我曾與喇嘛Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche這個(gè)被'世界上最幸福的人'呆了一個(gè)晚上。那么他是怎么做到的呢？練習(xí)。通過觀察他的行為，我注意到他能夠迅速從不安中恢復(fù)過來，這是一種科學(xué)的檢驗(yàn)快樂氣質(zhì)的方法。如果有什么事情讓你不安，不要有那些消極的想法，而是要解決問題，然后這件事就過去了。"

    Daniel Goleman is a psychologist and author, based in Massachusetts. 丹尼爾戈?duì)柭�是美國馬薩諸塞州的心理學(xué)家和作家。

    Be kind to yourself善待自己

    "我們對(duì)待自己的方式，寬容或者挑剔，對(duì)我們的保持良好狀態(tài)、產(chǎn)生滿足感以及解決困難的能力有很大的影響。如果你正在進(jìn)行自我批判，那么停下來，做幾個(gè)深呼吸，放松，努力去想像那些你理想中的良好品質(zhì)，比如善良、熱情、溫柔等等。你是不是真的具有這些品質(zhì)并不重要--你要像演員進(jìn)入角色一樣，感覺自己變成了那樣子。你可以寫日記記下你這樣做對(duì)你的自我批判有什么影響，然后把注意力集中到你打算去做的事情上。"

    保羅吉爾伯特是德比大學(xué)的臨床心理學(xué)教授。

    Use your pessimism利用悲觀主義

    "防御性悲觀主義者會(huì)把事情往最壞的地方想，并且他們會(huì)花費(fèi)很多精力想象事情會(huì)怎樣變得糟糕起來。但是這樣做會(huì)使他們更可能實(shí)現(xiàn)自己的目標(biāo)。這種技巧對(duì)每個(gè)人來說都是值得學(xué)習(xí)的。把注意力放在細(xì)節(jié)上，然后想象一種狀況中哪些細(xì)節(jié)可能會(huì)出錯(cuò)。如果你害怕在公眾場(chǎng)合發(fā)言，那么試著想清楚你害怕的事情，比如忘了臺(tái)詞或者在上登上領(lǐng)獎(jiǎng)臺(tái)的時(shí)候絆倒等等。然后想象接下來會(huì)發(fā)生的事情：如果你忘了臺(tái)詞，會(huì)不會(huì)有人笑？這樣做可以將你的注意力從現(xiàn)實(shí)中轉(zhuǎn)移出來，這樣你就能有效的進(jìn)行規(guī)劃，以避免（或者至少能夠處理）這些事情發(fā)生時(shí)產(chǎn)生的消極后果。"

    朱莉諾勒姆是瑪格麗特哈姆馬薩諸塞州韋爾斯利學(xué)院的心理學(xué)教授。

    Find a calling找個(gè)口號(hào)

    "少工作，少掙錢，少攢錢，增加家庭時(shí)間、節(jié)假日和其他有趣活動(dòng)。追求成功，但要記住，重要的是過程而不是結(jié)果，這很重要。如果你的工作不是一個(gè)口號(hào)，你能重新審視它，把它看得只是比一張支票重要的事情嗎？如果不能，那就努力在工作之外找個(gè)更高尚的目標(biāo)，比如參加宗教、教學(xué)、政治活動(dòng)。尋找能夠完全引起你注意并且你擅長(zhǎng)的活動(dòng)，比如參加合唱團(tuán)，學(xué)習(xí)繪畫，在蜿蜒的鄉(xiāng)村公路上飛快的騎自行車。這就是所謂的"flow".快樂并不是時(shí)時(shí)刻刻感到快活，或許有時(shí)候你能夠直接得到快樂。我們需要愛、工作以及重要事件之間的聯(lián)系。適時(shí)達(dá)到這些條件，然后等待。

    喬納森海德特是弗吉尼亞大學(xué)的心理學(xué)教授。

    Act happy快樂的生活

    "我對(duì)快樂和不快樂的人進(jìn)行了研究比較，證實(shí)了40%解決方案，即我們有能力通過自己的行動(dòng)和思考改變的快樂程度。我已經(jīng)確定了12種能夠增強(qiáng)快樂感的活動(dòng)，都是些快樂的人自然而然中會(huì)做的事情。這些事聽起來很陳腐，但卻被證明是很科學(xué)的。你只要找到最適合你做的那幾件事情來做就行，并不需要這12件中的每件都做。第一，表達(dá)謝意。第二，培養(yǎng)樂觀的態(tài)度，想象未來生活中每件事都跟你渴望的一樣，然后想象中的未來生活寫下來。第三，避免被過去的事情困擾或者過于關(guān)注別人的行為。第四，善意實(shí)踐，要比你平時(shí)做的更多。第五，和朋友們相處，要對(duì)朋友支持、忠誠。第六，制定應(yīng)對(duì)策略：當(dāng)你感到不安時(shí)寫下你的感受，并要努力明白，讓我們受傷的事情往往會(huì)使我們更加堅(jiān)強(qiáng)。第七，學(xué)會(huì)寬恕。第八，讓自己充滿活力，接受新事物。第九，品嘗生活的樂趣，慢慢品嘗糕點(diǎn)要比漫不經(jīng)心的大口吞咽過量糕點(diǎn)更能讓你感到享受。第十，為了某個(gè)有意義的目標(biāo)而工作。第十一，培養(yǎng)宗教信仰和精神支柱。最后一點(diǎn)，鍛煉。做這些事并不能讓你立即看到效果，就像其他重要的事情一樣，你必須努力去爭(zhēng)取。"