Law seeks to thwart "puppy love"

    8月底，黑龍江省十一屆人大常委會第十二次會議對《黑龍江省未成年人保護條例》進行了修訂，其中增加了有關(guān)未成年人"早戀"內(nèi)容的規(guī)定："父母或者其他監(jiān)護人應(yīng)當對未成年子女或者被監(jiān)護的未成年人進行批評、教育、制止和矯正。" In late August, at the 12th session of the 11th Standing Committee of Heilongjiang Provincial People's Congress regulations regarding the protection of minors were amended with the addition of provisions relevant to so-called "puppy love". The provisions state that: "Parents or other guardians should criticize, educate, stop and correct minors."

    現(xiàn)行的國家和其他地方的法律法規(guī)中，并沒有關(guān)于"早戀"的規(guī)定。黑龍江省成為首個對"早戀"問題進行立法的省。 Existing national and local laws and regulations have no provisions on "puppy love". Heilongjiang is the first province to so legislate.

    立法者：強調(diào)監(jiān)護人責(zé)任無可厚非 Legislator: guardians' responsibility.

    黑龍江省人大的一位立法官員表示，對于有關(guān)"早戀"的規(guī)定，應(yīng)當全面、正確解讀。條例中的"批評、教育、制止和矯正",并不是對所有的情況都一概而論，可由法定監(jiān)護人根據(jù)具體情況，選擇不同的有效方法。 A Congress legislative official said that the provisions should be used carefully. The directive to "criticize, educate, stop and correct" should not be dogmatically interpreted. It was important that legal guardians were sensitive to individual cases.

    也有一些不同的聲音，認為"雖說這樣的法律條文很難達到預(yù)期效果，但不能把立法限制早戀讀偏，對于立法價值也不能全盤否定".他們認為，應(yīng)當更重視法律的引導(dǎo)和教育功能。 Critical opinions are being voiced: "It will be difficult to use the law to achieve the desired effects. But we need to fully understand the legislation, we cannot simply reject it," These voices think that it is the educational aspects of the provisions that are most important.

    老師：早戀難界定，引導(dǎo)勝于法規(guī) Teachers: "puppy love" or "intense friendships"?

    廣州某中學(xué)的吳小建老師認為，立法者的出發(fā)點可以理解，但從教育角度上看卻欠缺人性化，難以實施。 Wu Xiaojian, a Guanzhou high school teacher, thinks that the provisions have educational value, but that they do not recognize the reality of the feelings of young people and will be difficult to implement.

    "現(xiàn)在我們對早戀的界定本就存在爭議：什么才算早戀？大多數(shù)高中生的生理已經(jīng)成熟，心理卻處于半成熟階段，我們?nèi)缃裨诮逃�中都不使用早戀這個詞，而從行為角度進行界定，叫異性交往過密。學(xué)生對此也比較容易接受。"她說 "We have no real definition of the 'puppy love' the provisions refer to, or what kind of behaviors fall under the category of 'puppy love'. Most high school students are less mentally mature than they are physically mature. We don't use the phrase 'puppy love' in education any more. From a behavioral standpoint, it would be better to speak of 'intense friendships'. Students, too, find that expression more agreeable," Wu said.

    家長：制止早戀寫進法規(guī)不具操作性 Parents:difficulty of implementing legislation.

    多數(shù)家長對這個法規(guī)并不贊同。 Most parents don't back the provisions.

    游太太的女兒剛上高一，對于這個新規(guī)定，她認為沒必要。"早戀是孩子的隱私問題，寫進法律本來就不對，把制止學(xué)生戀愛當作家長的一個義務(wù)也是不合理的，很難量化，也不具備現(xiàn)實的操作性。"她說，從孩子的心理特點來看，他們正處于叛逆期，強行制止和矯正，可能會適得其反，嚴重影響親子關(guān)系。 Mrs. You, whose daughter has just entered high school, thinks the new provisions are unnecessary. She said, "This is a matter of children's privacy and not a matter of law. It isn't the responsibility of parents, but the matter is a difficult one because 'puppy love' is so difficult to understand and it's difficult to implement rules with respect to it." In their teenage years children often go through a rebellious phase. If the regulations are implemented heavy-handedly, it will not be good for relations betweens parents and children.

    對于自己的女兒，游太太表示，當然希望她不要過早地戀愛，但如果真的戀愛了也不一定反對，因為健康的交往對她的生活學(xué)習(xí)未必就一定帶來負面影響。"就算要'制止',也要很有技巧，不能單憑法律規(guī)定。"她說。 Mrs. You said that she hopes her daughter will not form a romantic relationship early, but if she does she will not oppose it for fear of it having a negative effect on her daughter. "To deal effectively with these issues, we need to act responsibly rather than depend on regulations," she added.

    學(xué)生：硬性規(guī)定可能會引起叛逆心理 Children: the rules will result in rebelliousness

    此規(guī)定在學(xué)生中一石激起千重浪。 Students discuss the provisions.

    就讀于廣州某知名中學(xué)的小陳看來，早戀至少可以分為小學(xué)和中學(xué)兩個階段，家長的處理方式也應(yīng)有所區(qū)別。正值青春期初期的小學(xué)生，對于兩性和愛情存在朦朧的認識，家長應(yīng)科學(xué)地引導(dǎo)及糾正。具有一定是非辨別能力的中學(xué)生，更希望家長能像朋友一樣交流。 Xiao Chen, a Guanzhou high school student, believes "puppy love" can be divided into two kinds, corresponding to the school levels of students. Entering puberty, primary school students are largely ignorant about the opposite sex, so parents need to guide and correct their behavior. Secondary school students, who are more capable of making judgments, are often eager to go to parents for advice

    "費這么大力氣定出的這些硬邦邦的法規(guī)條文，還不如在學(xué)校里安排一些親子講座，讓家長和學(xué)生一起學(xué)習(xí)交流，這樣的效果可能會更好。"她說。 "Instead of legislation, we need something like a lecture program to teach parents and children how to talk with each other freely." she said.

    專家： 粗暴制止孩子早戀不可取，不如一起面對 Expert: Let's face the issue together

    資深心理咨詢師于東輝認為，在對早戀進行法律規(guī)定完全沒有必要。 Senior psychologist Yu Donghui believes that the "puppy love" provisions are totally unnecessary.

    "對孩子的教育是一個家庭的事情，你可以在道德上對其不適當?shù)男袨檫M行譴責(zé)，媒體可以加以引導(dǎo)，但早戀本身并不違法，上升到法律法規(guī)的層面是一件滑稽的事情。"他說。 "Children`s education is the responsibility of family. Certain behaviors should be condemned, it is true. And there is a role for the media in offering guidance. But it seems strange to make laws about puppy love, which is not illegal.".

    "早戀不可怕，可怕的是視其如洪水猛獸。對家長而言，一旦發(fā)現(xiàn)子女有早戀的苗頭，首先要用恰當方式進行制止，否則可能會給孩子造成心理陰影。其次，父母要與孩子一起面對青春期的躁動和困惑，并提供適當?shù)慕ㄗh。" "There is nothing particularly wrong with 'puppy love', but provisions like these threaten to turn it into something monstrous. If a parent discovers a relationship they should try to find the right way to stop it. Handled insensitively, it will have a bad effect on the child. Parents should face the problems of puberty together, and offer advice."

    歷數(shù)防止早戀雷人怪招 thunder-shock measures to stop puppy love

    設(shè)定"標準距離" set "standard distance"

    南京市某高中曾給所有女生開了一個會，要求女生在與男生接觸時應(yīng)保持44厘米的"標準距離". A Nanjing high school held a meeting at which girls were called on to maintain an "average distance" of 44 centimeters from boys.

    刪除《牛郎織女》 delete "Legend of Love"（Niulang,Zhinv）

    在我國流傳很廣、家喻戶曉的民間故事《牛郎織女》落選新學(xué)期小學(xué)語文教材，重慶市教科院教研員喬華分析說，可能是編者擔心娃娃會受到早戀影響才刪除的。 "Legend of Love", a famous folk tale, is no longer features in primary school textbooks. Qiao Hua, who works at the Chongqing Academy of Education and Science, says the reason may be that the editors considered the question of puppy love before making choices about selections.

    實行男女分班 to assign the class by gender

    上海、北京、重慶等地的個別中學(xué)，曾在高中部實行男女分班，以防止學(xué)生早戀。 In Shanghai, Beijing, Chongqing and other cities, some secondary schools have divided classes up by gender in a move to thwart puppy love.